New animated series Iron Man: Armored Adventures premiered in the US recently, finally answering the question “What if they made a cartoon about Iron Man that completely lost everything that made the movie good?”

It has to be said, Armored Adventures is so different from the Iron Man dvd - or the original Iron Man comic, for that matter - that you have to wonder why anyone even bothered calling it Iron Man in the first place. Yes, the hero is Tony Stark, and yes, he’s a genius who builds himself a suit of armor to save the day… but this is a teenage Stark, whose heart problems come from a plane crash that kills his father, as opposed to being damaged by something he had a hand in creating. Rhodey becomes a teenage best friend, and Pepper a high school student with the hots for Tony, and almost everything becomes much more generic as a result - certainly, the relationships between the characters could come from a million other cartoons, and there’s nothing in the flat banter here to match the swagger of the movie.

It’s difficult to say just how badly Armored Adventures misses the mark, because it’s just so different from - and suffers so much in comparison to - last year’s movie, which was probably the best portrayal of the character in years. Perhaps if you’d never seen the movie, then this would at least seem passable…? But if you had - or, if you read Matt Fraction’s impressive take on the character in the monthly Invincible Iron Man comic - then there’s no way to look at this than a dumbed-down version made all the worse by the shoddiness of the process. The Nicktoons audience should complain at being patronized so lazily.

The preeminent show of the 1990’s decade, Seinfeld grew from an idea of “a show about nothing” into a sacred pop culture icon, not that there’s anything wrong with that… The show follows the life of comedian Jerry Seinfeld and the exploits of his “short, quirky, bald guy” best friend, George Costanza (Jason Alexander), Jerry’s neurotic neighbor Cosmo Kramer (Michael Richards), and Jerry’s ex-girlfriend Elaine (Julia Louis-Dreyfus). Through the years, they’re joined by a loveable cast of characters that includes Newman, Uncle Leo, the Soup Nazi, Frank and Estelle Costanza, the Bubble Boy, and countless others…

The Seinfeld DVD (Seasons 1 & 2) offers the very first glimpse into the world Jerry, beginning with The Pilot (episode 1) which was originally titled The Seinfeld Chronicles. The first scene involves Jerry commenting to George about a button on his shirt (the same conversation later takes place in the last scene of the series finale). These opening episodes provide insight into the development of the show’s four primary characters with conversations that range from George’s initial admission that he’d like to be an architect (episode 2) to Kramer’s propensity for get rich quick schemes like a make-your-own-pizza pizzeria (episode 4). From day one, Seinfeld established itself as “must see TV,” creating such memorable episodes as “The Stock Tip,” “The Pony Remark,” “The Deal,” and “The Chinese Restaurant”.

Interestingly, in the pilot episode of Seinfeld, Elaine’s character does not yet exist, and Kramer’s character (not yet named Kramer, but Feldman) is more of an unemployed, pathetic, shut-in neighbor than the usual quirky and energetic Cosmo. Playing the role of the female in George and Jerry’s life is a wisecracking waitress named Claire (Lee Garlington) who never appears in later episodes.

Nevertheless, this initial episode exhibits the flashes of brilliance that made Seinfeld a cultural phenomenon. The show is essentially about nothing. George and Jerry do some laundry… Jerry and his neighbor watch some TV… George and Jerry have some coffee… During that time, the dominant topic of conversation is a girl that Jerry met while taking his comedy act on the road. She’s coming to stay at his place, but he doesn’t know whether he should pull out a mattress for her or not. Feldman (Kramer), George, and Jerry debate the topic endlessly until the woman arrives and Jerry learns that it’s all irrelevant because she’s engaged…

Below is a list of episodes included on the Seinfeld (Seasons 1 & 2) DVD:

Episode 1 (Pilot: Good News, Bad News) Air Date: 07-05-1989
Episode 2 (The Stakeout) Air Date: 05-31-1990
Episode 3 (The Robbery) Air Date: 06-07-1990
Episode 4 (Male Unbonding) Air Date: 06-14-1990
Episode 5 (The Stock Tip) Air Date: 06-21-1990
Episode 6 (The Ex-Girlfriend) Air Date: 01-23-1991
Episode 7 (The Pony Remark) Air Date: 01-30-1991
Episode 8 (The Jacket) Air Date: 02-06-1991
Episode 9 (The Phone Message) Air Date: 02-13-1991
Episode 10 (The Apartment) Air Date: 04-04-1991
Episode 11 (The Statue) Air Date: 04-11-1991
Episode 12 (The Revenge) Air Date: 04-18-1991
Episode 13 (The Heart Attack) Air Date: 04-25-1991
Episode 14 (The Deal) Air Date: 05-02-1991
Episode 15 (The Baby Shower) Air Date: 05-16-1991
Episode 16 (The Chinese Restaurant) Air Date: 05-23-1991
Episode 17 (The Busboy) Air Date: 06-26-1991

About the Author

Britt Gillette is author of The DVD Report, a blog where you can find more reviews like this one of the Seinfeld (DVD).